One day, I realized that I didn’t say thank you enough in certain situations, even though I felt that way. The situations were mostly at work. (I quit my job lately by the way.) I was supposed to do something but I didn’t know too much about it, maybe because it was something new or I hadn’t learned how to do it yet. Most likely senior colleagues helped me to tackle the tasks. Sometimes it took a bit long time and the person should stay longer at work only to help me. I wanted to be an excellent and competent person at work who knew how to do anything and everything so well. So those moments, needing big help from others, were embarrassing and I felt sorry about that. I seriously said that I was sorry after just briefly saying that I thanked the person. Or sometimes I even omitted to say thank you, assuming that the person would definitely and telepathically understand that I thank the one. Maybe it is partly a Korean thing, like people abashedly smiling when they made a mistake. But it can vary from a person to the other. So I don’t want to blame our culture.
How I realized that I didn’t say thank you enough was from a conversation with a colleague. He had always been straight forward about his opinion and said that I didn’t thank him enough for his massive help. That struck me. My presumption was wrong and people didn’t know how I felt. And I also realized that I actually didn’t thank others enough seriously. It was more about my ego that hurt. I focused more on how embarrassing I was than how I should be grateful to the person and appreciate his/her efforts.
I was arrogant, though I thought to be humble. I didn’t want to admit that I would make just as many mistakes as others and I was arrogant.
I may act being arrogant sometimes not knowingly, in a sense that being embarrassed to admit that I am ignorant about something. Then I tell myself that there are so many things to learn and there’s no reason to be embarrassed about not knowing things. Danish Janteloven, but in a positive elaboration of which, gives me a great lesson in that sense.
Let’s say thank you, appreciate things that are given. That would make a person humble, happy and be ready to grow and improve. 🙂